Owner of the oldest fine dining restaurant in US shares etiquette tips (2024)

Want to brush up on your table manners? Then read on for some top tips from one of America's oldest fine dining establishments.

Delmonico's in New York was founded by Swiss immigrants in 1824 and it has since been credited with birthing the first printed menu in the U.S. and several well-known dishes including Baked Alaska and Eggs Benedict.

In 1837, it moved into 56 Beaver Street in Downtown Manhattan where it remains to this day, and thanks to its sense of swagger it has attracted a roster of well-known figures, from Mark Twain to the Prince of Wales to at least 11 U.S. Presidents.

Dennis Turcinovic, who is the owner of DRG Hospitality which currently operates Delmonico's, told DailyMail.com that he has been part of the business for more than 20 years, and during this time, he has crafted a list of etiquette rules to help diners find their way.

Here, the restaurateur shares 11 of his top tips, from how to eat bread rolls to how to tip appropriately. Take a bite down and have your fill.

Be punctual

Dennis Turcinovic is the owner of DRG Hospitality which currently operates Delmonico's and he has been involved with the landmark restaurant for more than 20 years

By arriving to your reservation on time,Dennis highlights that 'not only are you showing respect for the host but also for other diners.'

If you arrive late to dine, it could have a knock-on effect, with later patrons having to wait for their tables.

Dress for the occasion

Before you head out to dine, Dennis recommends 'checking the dress code and guidelines outlined by each establishment' and dressing accordingly.

Most restaurants state their dress code policy online but 'if in doubt, err on the side of being more formal.'

Delmonico's does not have a dress code, but the suggestion is business casual.

Limit cell phone use

Spending all mealtime on your phone is a complete no-no in Dennis' books.

He says on the subject of cell phone use: 'We know the importance of being connected to our family and friends but it's also important to keep our phones on silent mode so we don't disturb others.

'This includes bothering people on neighboring tables including those in your party.

'Keeping the phone off the table is also something to keep in mind, as this reduces temptation to check messages or social media.'

Use the correct utensils

Sitting down at a fancy restaurant can be intimidating, Dennis says, with 'an array of utensils you may not know the specific use for each.'

Variations can range from steak knives to soup spoons to fish knives to oyster forks.

Offering some tips on how to navigate a selection of silverware, he continues: 'Generally, you start with the outermost utensils and work your way inward as each course is served.

'Forks are usually on the left and knives and spoons on the right. Also, don't be afraid to observe others or follow the lead of your host!'

Don't eat a bread roll at once

There is a wrong and right way to eat a bread, according to Dennis.

He suggests the politest way of tackling a roll or slice is to 'break it into small pieces and butter one piece at a time.'

Then, 'eating small pieces throughout your meal is a good choice.'

He warns against cutting a roll with a knife but to break it with your hands instead.

Another pet peeve of his is someone who 'butters the entire roll at once.'

Sommeliers are there to help

Most upscale restaurants have a sommelier on hand to help, Dennis says, and he adds that they should not be ignored.

He explains: 'If you are unsure about how to navigate the wine list or which one to pair with your meal, do ask the sommelier!

'They are eager to help you decide on the often extensive wine list, so never hesitate to ask for their expert advice.'

Delmonico's prides itself on its extensive wine selection, with a vast cellar at the Beaver Street location allowing for hundreds of bottles.

Put your napkin to use

When you sit at the table, Dennis says the first thing you should do is to 'unfold your napkin and place it on your lap.'

This signals you are ready to dine. In some restaurants, a server might come around and do this for you.

If you have to excuse yourself from the table, Dennis suggest 'loosely folding the napkin and placing it to the left of your plate.'

Some also suggest placing the napkin on the arm of your chair but never on the back, in case there is food on the cloth that gets on the chair and could stain an outfit.

Don't rush your meal

A ladies' lunch held at Delmonico's restaurant in 1902, with guests dressed in their finery

To have a satisfying dining experience, Dennis recommends relaxing and taking your time.

You might have to vacate your table at a certain point but this doesn't mean you have to rush.

The hospitality expert advises: 'Enjoy each bite and chew with your mouth closed.

'Avoid rushing through your meal and finishing before others at your table.

'Pacing yourself will not only add to a relaxed and enjoyable experience but it will also put others at ease.'

Handle problems calmly

If you are not happy with a dish or a drink, Dennis says there is no point in acting out and causing a scene.

This can cause embarrassment for fellow diners and be a source of entertainment for other patrons in the restaurant.

He advises: 'First and foremost, be discreet in letting your server know that there was a problem. Also, remain calm. This will make your server more willing to help.

'They are there to ensure you have a pleasant dining experience and will usually handle the situation with professionalism.'

Make toasts short and sweet

Many times, Dennis says Delmonico's welcomes guests who 'have a special occasion that calls for a toast.'

But he highlights that their is a protocol for toasting.

He instructs: 'Make sure you hold your glass by the stem or base, raising it slightly.

'It is important to keep the toast brief and respectful as this is a gesture of goodwill and appreciation.

'This will also lessen the impact on fellow diners.'

Tip accordingly

Although tipping can vary by region, Dennis says 'a common guideline is to tip between 15 per cent to 20 per cent of the total bill before tax.'

If you have enjoyed your restaurant experience, he highlights that 'this is your way to show appreciation for the good service.'

In some establishments, the tip is already added so it is worth checking the bill before adding extra.

In New York, tipping ranges from 18 per cent to 25 per cent.

Delmonico's: The history of America's first fine dining restaurant

Founded by Italian-Swiss immigrants the Delmonico brothers, Pietro and Giovanni, in 1837 - the restaurant was the first in the city to offer a la carte dining at a time when the only competition were cafes and inns serving British fare.

It was the first restaurant in the U.S. to lay white table cloths and provide diners with printed menus - one side in English, the other French.

Business boomed and its reputation soon spread throughout the city, catering to Wall Street tycoons, the political elite and cultural luminaries.

In 1860, Delmonico's laid on the supper at the grand ball welcoming Albert Edward, Prince of Wales, later to be crowned King Edward VII, to the US.

Business boomed and from 1865 to 1888 the brothers opened four more restaurants, including a palatial site on Fifth Avenue dubbed the Delmonico Building.

In 1905, Delmonico's hosted Mark Twain's 70th birthday dinner. The bash was attended by 170 guests including the future first lady Edith Wilson, the author and social activist Dorothy Canfield and Twain's nephew Samuel E Moffett.

It was the first restaurant in the U.S. to lay white table cloths and provide diners with printed menus - one side in English, the other French. Above, a menu from 1899

However, just two decades later Delmonico's was forced to shutter its doors in 1923 - business strangled by the post-WWI recession and Prohibition era.

Two years later, Tuscan-born Oscar Tucci walked by the empty building and, peering inside, saw his American Dream. Prohibition posed no problem for Tucci whose wife smuggled bootleg gin into the restaurant stashed under the blankets in the baby carriage of son Mario.

Tucci ingeniously bypassed the alcohol ban by selling Delmonico dollars, a scrip which patrons could buy and then use to purchase drinks at the bar.

After prohibition ended in 1933, Tucci converted the site from speakeasy to fine dining, following in the tradition of the Delmonico brothers. He refurbished the restaurant, brought back printed menus and had the brass rails of the bar polished twice a day.

Tucci believed in providing his diners with an experience and drilled into his staff a strict code of hospitality, discretion and etiquette.

A stream of celebrities and dignitaries including Elizabeth Taylor, JFK, Marilyn Monroe, Eva Gabor, and the Duke and duch*ess of Windsor flooded through the doors. Paparazzi were not to step foot inside and any staff members found speaking to reporters would be fired.

Megastars like Frank Sinatra, Marlene Dietrich, and Elvis Presley flocked to the venue for this reason, dining out on oysters Rockefeller and ribeye Bordelaise at tables adorned with Lalique glassware and Cartier cigarette lighters.

Celebrities felt so comfortable, in fact, that burlesque star Gypsy Rose Lee once stripped off atop a table - covering her assets with a menu.

Off the back of the restaurant's success, Tucci had taken over most of the flatiron building and created several dining rooms, each with its individual decor and ambience.

Delmonico's lays claim to Eggs Benedict, with the original recipe comprising poached eggs, soft pork belly, brioche, andhollandaise sauce

The space meant that famous faces could enjoy dinner in private suites, away from prying eyes and listening ears.

While Hollywood stars flocked there for special occasions, it was the local crowd of Wall Street workers who were Delmonico's stock and trade.

The restaurant served up to a thousand 'power lunches' every day, and a ticker was installed at one end of the bar with the tables closest to it reserved for the Street's biggest sharks.

But the city was changing and with crime rates soaring in the 1980s, Tucci was looking for a way out. The family went on to sell the business in 1987.

After changing hands several times since then, the restaurant was briefly the subject of a legal dispute over its name and the use of the flatiron building at Beaver Street.

The restaurant was closed throughout the pandemic, but it reopened in September 2023 following a major refurbishment which marries its old school charm with a touch of 21st century flair.

Tucci's grandson Max is now a thirdgeneration partner in the business. When the restaurant reopened, he went about highlighting its place in the city, stating:'Delmonico's is older than the Statue of Liberty, it is older than the Brooklyn Bridge, it is older than Grand Central.'

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Owner of the oldest fine dining restaurant in US shares etiquette tips (2024)
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